Sunday, January 06, 2013

Sibling Rivalry

I grew up an only child.  Only after age 11 did I have step-siblings (for the next 10 years).  And then they were gone (long story).  And so, while I had a brief experience with brothers and a sister, I was always, really, an "only" child.

And for this reason, I do not understand and strongly dislike sibling rivalry.  I do not understand why my children must have competitions to find out (1) who is faster, (2) who is smarter, and (3) who is better at whatever.  These competitions started out few and far between, but they seem to be picking up the pace - now that Chase is so firmly putting her foot down about growing up (see definition of 6 going on 16).  I find myself yelling (slow down! don't race!) as the girls wiz by on their scooters (for good reason, I might add, because scooters are so unstable at high speeds).  I actually took their scooters away for a short time, as a result of them racing each other after I had told them not to.

Now I know sibling rivalry is supposed to be "healthy" (yah, whatever), and "natural" (really?), but I can't stand it.  So I have, unknowingly, embarked on my own quest to decrease sibling rivalry, and increase sibling teamwork.

Lesson 1 - Don't Make Your Sister Feel Dumb (Take this opportunity to educate her!) - So Chase has been asking Madoc questions, that there is no way Madoc can answer.  I know this makes Chase feel really smart, like she knows so much, and putting down her sister for not knowing these things automatically, somehow, makes her feel better.  So I'm not sure where she got this idea (school, anyone?) but I told her today - STOP making your sister feel silly for not knowing things.  Take this opportunity to educate her!  She will think you know EVERYTHING and are the smartest sister in town.  She will always ask you her tough questions, and you will most likely always know the answer.  What's better than that?

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