Tomorrow, we head to the mountains. We're going to Grand Lake, which we've heard is lovely. We'll be there for four nights (except Hubs, who has to come home on Sunday - and leave for New Jersey on Monday). Yuck-o. So it's going to be me and the girls (and the rest of the crew).
I must admit, I hesitated about going, knowing that I would have to watch the girls all by myself for four days/three nights (there will be other families there too, it's just more work when you're away from home). But then I said, "Self, seriously. Are you going to deny the girls experiences because it's a hassle for you?" And I thought about how easy it would have been to not travel when Chase was little, but how much she got out of it - how much I got out of it. Sure, Grand Lake is not exactly the same - but traveling with two kids is not the same as traveling with one, either. So I decided then and there, what I always knew to be true (what sort of strange sentence was that?). That when it comes to me being a mom, I will never take the easy route out. I will always try to give them new experiences, over just staying at home. And hopefully, when they get older, they will value it - and perhaps even incorporate it into their own lives.
My parents passed it down to me, now it's my turn to pass it along to my little ones. I love you, girls!
Friday, August 21, 2009
Tuesday, August 18, 2009
Class Lemonade
We just returned from a class lemonade, given by Chase's preschool. Chase had so much fun she didn't want to leave. She cried when it was time to go. Maybe I should enroll her in a m,w,f am program, too!
Sunday, August 16, 2009
Bugs
I have to admit that for the past six months, I have been just trying to get through each day - just trying to keep Chase from smothering Madoc with her love. Trying to spend equal amounts of time with both. Trying to show Chase my love for her has only grown stronger, not diminished, since Madoc was born.
I used to do a lot of projects with Chase, but over the past six months, I must admit there have been a distinct lack of projects. As Madoc is now capable of being on her own (but watched like a hawk), I decided it was high time to up my game on the project/arts/crafts front.
So Chase and I studied bugs yesterday.
We made bugs from all sorts of things - paper, clay, puff balls.
We talked about bugs that live in trees, bugs that live on rocks, bugs that live in the water.
These are clay bugs, which we named and made stories about.
She came up with "reader bugs," who read books at the reader bug library.
I used to do a lot of projects with Chase, but over the past six months, I must admit there have been a distinct lack of projects. As Madoc is now capable of being on her own (but watched like a hawk), I decided it was high time to up my game on the project/arts/crafts front.
So Chase and I studied bugs yesterday.
We made bugs from all sorts of things - paper, clay, puff balls.
We talked about bugs that live in trees, bugs that live on rocks, bugs that live in the water.
These are clay bugs, which we named and made stories about.
She came up with "reader bugs," who read books at the reader bug library.
Madoc's First Word
Madoc said her first word today. "Dada."
Hubs looked at her as if to say, "really?"
She smiled and said, "Dada."
Hubs looked at her as if to say, "really?"
She smiled and said, "Dada."
Friday, August 14, 2009
New Bike
Chase's new "big girl" bike arrived today.
She was so excited.
Even though it didn't have Dora and Boots all over it.
She showed Hubs how to put it together.
And then at last...
We put her helmet on and took her around the block. Two blocks, actually. And finally, on the last leg, she really nailed it. Speeding up and then braking, like it was no big thing. And then she told us, "this is how I ride my bike," and she proceeded to walk us through it. She gets very authoritative and almost sounds like she is reading from an instruction manual at times (I wonder where she gets this - not).
She was so excited.
Even though it didn't have Dora and Boots all over it.
She showed Hubs how to put it together.
And then at last...
We put her helmet on and took her around the block. Two blocks, actually. And finally, on the last leg, she really nailed it. Speeding up and then braking, like it was no big thing. And then she told us, "this is how I ride my bike," and she proceeded to walk us through it. She gets very authoritative and almost sounds like she is reading from an instruction manual at times (I wonder where she gets this - not).
Lemon Pie
Chase is a great helper in the kitchen. She loves it - I love it. She cooks with me on a regular basis. She is especially good at making sandwiches for her daddy's lunch.
Yesterday, she helped me bake a lemon pie. Her job? To spoon the seeds out of the lemon juice. She was very enthusiastic at first. But then she began to get discouraged. She said, "Mommy, there are too many seeds." I told her to do what she could and that I would do the rest. She kept at it. And kept at it. There must have been twenty seeds.
When she got to the last seed, she said, "Mommy, this seed is just too fast." And then she got it. She was so happy she asked me to take a picture of her with the seeds. (I keep telling her not to stick her tongue out, but I think her tongue is too big for her little mouth, as it keeps appearing in photos.)
Yesterday, she helped me bake a lemon pie. Her job? To spoon the seeds out of the lemon juice. She was very enthusiastic at first. But then she began to get discouraged. She said, "Mommy, there are too many seeds." I told her to do what she could and that I would do the rest. She kept at it. And kept at it. There must have been twenty seeds.
When she got to the last seed, she said, "Mommy, this seed is just too fast." And then she got it. She was so happy she asked me to take a picture of her with the seeds. (I keep telling her not to stick her tongue out, but I think her tongue is too big for her little mouth, as it keeps appearing in photos.)
Thursday, August 13, 2009
Mads (7.5 months) & Chase (3.5 years)
She is on the move. She loves to crawl across the floor. She loves to stick her hand in Taggart's water bowl. She can sit unsupported. She went in a swing for the first time today. She went down a slide (on her tummy, feet first) and was SO happy - happy out of her mind. When I took her off, she started crying. I put her back on - she stopped crying and started laughing. She's awesome.
Chase is having a hard time being 3.5 years old. There is a lot of drama. About everything. About food. About "boo boos." Everything seems to be whatever it is, magnified, times 100. If she is tired, then we are in for tears. Screaming. But then the sweet Chase returns. Eventually. Tired. And watching her in the meltdown process reminds me of me when I was little. Wanting to be good, but wanting to just scream. And so I let her scream. Until she doesn't want to anymore. And then I hug her, and tell her I love her. I tell her it's okay, not to worry and that I love her. I will always love her. No matter what.
Chase is having a hard time being 3.5 years old. There is a lot of drama. About everything. About food. About "boo boos." Everything seems to be whatever it is, magnified, times 100. If she is tired, then we are in for tears. Screaming. But then the sweet Chase returns. Eventually. Tired. And watching her in the meltdown process reminds me of me when I was little. Wanting to be good, but wanting to just scream. And so I let her scream. Until she doesn't want to anymore. And then I hug her, and tell her I love her. I tell her it's okay, not to worry and that I love her. I will always love her. No matter what.
Tuesday, August 04, 2009
Babies
I'm starting to understand why women have babies. Lots of babies. There is something absolutely intoxicating about having someone need you; really need you. Sure, it's exhausting, but there is also something about it that makes one want more. No, I'm not saying I want another baby - my two girls make me very happy.
About two weeks ago, Madoc decided to self-wean. Perhaps she sensed I was unable to make the decision myself, so she decided to take it into her own hands. The first time she pulled away from me it made me so sad. And it still makes me sad. We are down to three feeds (roughly) and at this point it is way more about comfort than anything else. After all the sacrifice (food, sleep, my body, my life), after putting my head down, gritting my teeth and nursing her through reflux, I definitely feel like I am missing it, missing her needing me. Of course I know she still needs me, and Chase needs me. It's just the realization that we're moving on to the next chapter - the part where Madoc is no longer a baby, eating solids, moving around.
I can certainly understand why parents freak out when their kids leave for college, when they get their own life. While at the same time, you want them to be their own person, have strong beliefs and live their own life. Being a parent is a crazy endeavor.
About two weeks ago, Madoc decided to self-wean. Perhaps she sensed I was unable to make the decision myself, so she decided to take it into her own hands. The first time she pulled away from me it made me so sad. And it still makes me sad. We are down to three feeds (roughly) and at this point it is way more about comfort than anything else. After all the sacrifice (food, sleep, my body, my life), after putting my head down, gritting my teeth and nursing her through reflux, I definitely feel like I am missing it, missing her needing me. Of course I know she still needs me, and Chase needs me. It's just the realization that we're moving on to the next chapter - the part where Madoc is no longer a baby, eating solids, moving around.
I can certainly understand why parents freak out when their kids leave for college, when they get their own life. While at the same time, you want them to be their own person, have strong beliefs and live their own life. Being a parent is a crazy endeavor.
Monday, August 03, 2009
We Are Expecting...
to be an aunt and uncle in late January. No pics of the expectant mum or dad for now. Hoping to get a good shot over Thanksgiving or Christmas. I am betting he will be a boy.
We are also planning to welcome a little cousin in the Fall. No word as to the gender - yet!
Fingers crossed for Auntie Lockett/Uncle Courtney and Uncle Pat/Aye for safe, happy pregnancies.
We are also planning to welcome a little cousin in the Fall. No word as to the gender - yet!
Fingers crossed for Auntie Lockett/Uncle Courtney and Uncle Pat/Aye for safe, happy pregnancies.
Portland Trip
Just returned from our Portland trip. Had so much fun. Wish we were still there. Boo hoo.
Dad and Fern play with Madoc...
Mom and Chase played non-stop...
We caught up with my family...
Here's my cousin Sean holding Madoc...
Mom and Mads...
Yay Yay and Chase...
Yay Yay and Nee Nee with Chase...
Hubs and Mads... awe...
Dad and Fern play with Madoc...
Mom and Chase played non-stop...
We caught up with my family...
Here's my cousin Sean holding Madoc...
Mom and Mads...
Yay Yay and Chase...
Yay Yay and Nee Nee with Chase...
Hubs and Mads... awe...
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
Bastille Day
Today we celebrated Bastille Day.
Breakfast for Hubs was "french toast" made with a croissant (I can't pull off crepes with a 7-month-old...maybe next year). Chase and I made Pots de Creme (but I cheated and made a really simple recipe - same reason as above), which we decorated with strawberries and blueberries (like the French flag). We drew and colored the French flag, the Eiffel Tower and the L'Arc de Triomphe. And finally, we listened (and marched) to the French National Anthem. Oh, and I listened to a little Tour de France coverage on NPR. Quite a day!
Breakfast for Hubs was "french toast" made with a croissant (I can't pull off crepes with a 7-month-old...maybe next year). Chase and I made Pots de Creme (but I cheated and made a really simple recipe - same reason as above), which we decorated with strawberries and blueberries (like the French flag). We drew and colored the French flag, the Eiffel Tower and the L'Arc de Triomphe. And finally, we listened (and marched) to the French National Anthem. Oh, and I listened to a little Tour de France coverage on NPR. Quite a day!
Monday, July 13, 2009
Health...
So some more weird, health news, I just rec'd my cholesterol test results and my cholesterol is high, mostly due to my crazy high HDL (88), last time it was 90.
And in other news, I definitely turned into my mother today. Totally freaked out when I saw what Chase had made at Summer camp. Their *snack* today was a good sized cup filled with the following layers: 1) brownie, 2) whip cream, 3) gummie worms and 4) small marshmallows. The cup probably holds about 2 cups of water, so you can only imagine what it looked like as I jumped across the table and pulled it from Chase's chocolaty, whip-cream covered fingers. I totally lost my cool. I told her she could have five more bites and then she had to throw it away. (And yes, I said this in front of the other kids, whose parents were like - geez, over-react a little why don't you). Chase kept her cool, but it was a little touch and go there for a while.
I think I'll throw together some recipe ideas for their next "cool bites" camp. I don't mind Chase having treats, but I have a big problem with American portions.
And in other news, I definitely turned into my mother today. Totally freaked out when I saw what Chase had made at Summer camp. Their *snack* today was a good sized cup filled with the following layers: 1) brownie, 2) whip cream, 3) gummie worms and 4) small marshmallows. The cup probably holds about 2 cups of water, so you can only imagine what it looked like as I jumped across the table and pulled it from Chase's chocolaty, whip-cream covered fingers. I totally lost my cool. I told her she could have five more bites and then she had to throw it away. (And yes, I said this in front of the other kids, whose parents were like - geez, over-react a little why don't you). Chase kept her cool, but it was a little touch and go there for a while.
I think I'll throw together some recipe ideas for their next "cool bites" camp. I don't mind Chase having treats, but I have a big problem with American portions.
Friday, July 10, 2009
Diabetes Scare
As if the Hep C scare wasn't enough, Hubs received an inaccurate blood glucose level reading from his doctor. We found out the next day that it was, in fact, inaccurate, but for 24 hours Hubs thought he might have Diabetes. Good golly. What a week.
Fear, Prayer, Love, Life
On the Fourth of July I heard a story on the radio. A story that has rocked my world for the past week. A story about a tech at Rose Medical Center, who injected herself, multiple times with a painkilling drug. She then filled the dirty needle with saline and put it back on the shelf. In doing so, she may have passed Hepatitis C to any number of patients who had surgery at Rose between October and April of this year.
Hepatitis C is a virus that effects your liver. There is a cure (for some), some folks kick it themselves, but others die from it. And there is an outrageous percentage of people who have it, who don't know it, because many people don't show any symptoms - and some, can live their whole lives and never know they have it.
Thing is, I was one of the 5,000 patients who had surgery there (I had a small thing done after Madoc was born).
I don't ever think I have ever been so scared in my life. Being told that you have a risk of being infected by a hospital you trust, exposed to a contagious disease, is no way to spend a week. I had dreams about tornadoes every night. I called my Grandfather, who I believe is the closest to God a man can get, and asked him to pray for me. I'm a big fan in preventative prayer.
And I received word today that I am clean. Thank God. Thanks to my Grandfather for his prayers, and for the prayers from my immediate family. I believe they helped.
I ask everyone who reads this to say a little prayer for the 4,999 people who touched by this, who are waiting to hear, who are dreaming about tornadoes. And I also ask everyone to take a minute and be thankful for everything bold and beautiful in your life.
Hepatitis C is a virus that effects your liver. There is a cure (for some), some folks kick it themselves, but others die from it. And there is an outrageous percentage of people who have it, who don't know it, because many people don't show any symptoms - and some, can live their whole lives and never know they have it.
Thing is, I was one of the 5,000 patients who had surgery there (I had a small thing done after Madoc was born).
I don't ever think I have ever been so scared in my life. Being told that you have a risk of being infected by a hospital you trust, exposed to a contagious disease, is no way to spend a week. I had dreams about tornadoes every night. I called my Grandfather, who I believe is the closest to God a man can get, and asked him to pray for me. I'm a big fan in preventative prayer.
And I received word today that I am clean. Thank God. Thanks to my Grandfather for his prayers, and for the prayers from my immediate family. I believe they helped.
I ask everyone who reads this to say a little prayer for the 4,999 people who touched by this, who are waiting to hear, who are dreaming about tornadoes. And I also ask everyone to take a minute and be thankful for everything bold and beautiful in your life.
Sunday, July 05, 2009
It's Complicated.
I decided to wean Madoc this month. And then I changed my mind. I've worked so hard and come so far it's like I have a mental block against stopping; like I can't. But I want to. I want my body back - all to myself. Which strikes me as being so selfish. "C'mon woman, you can do this another5 months, right?" I keep saying to myself. It's only 5 more months. I've already given up everything for 6 months - and made all kinds of changes for the 9 months prior, so what's the big deal? I guess the big deal is that I've started to feel like I need to give myself a little tlc. I've been putting everyone first for so long. But then it's not fair that Madoc gets the short end of the stick. And so I will most likely continue. For Madoc - And because I am consumed with guilt that I want to stop. And so this post serves as a small window to show what goes through my mind. Daily. Hourly. I obsess about these things. And then I decide not to worry about them until tomorrow (very Scarlet O'hara) , but then I do.
Bottom line? Madoc looks great. She will do well either way. And I have the hardest time when I know the decision I make can not be reversed. I can't just take a week off. I can't even take a day off. And I need a break. But then, after the break, I know I will miss it. Somehow, I will miss ever last bit of it. I missed Chase the moment I realized I couldn't feed her anymore. So maybe I just won't make the decision today. Maybe I'll make it tomorrow.
Bottom line? Madoc looks great. She will do well either way. And I have the hardest time when I know the decision I make can not be reversed. I can't just take a week off. I can't even take a day off. And I need a break. But then, after the break, I know I will miss it. Somehow, I will miss ever last bit of it. I missed Chase the moment I realized I couldn't feed her anymore. So maybe I just won't make the decision today. Maybe I'll make it tomorrow.
I'm Getting Old
For the past week or so my feet have been tingling. My hands have been tingling. I've felt a weird, nervy sensation in my right arm up to my elbow. So I stopped wearing flip flops (good move, I should have done it ages ago), and I started wearing a wrist brace, and now the tingling is almost all gone - I know it's because I've been carrying around a small child for three years, walking in poor shoes (or no shoes around the house) and living with wood, slate and marble floors. Now with Madoc (and all that baby kit), I am really starting to feel it. My body, while probably in the best shape ever, can't keep up with all the twisting and turning. Standing, stooping, kneeling. I need a massage. Make that 365 massages. One for every day of the year.
That said, every ache and pain is worth it. My two girls are amazing.
That said, every ache and pain is worth it. My two girls are amazing.
Chase's New Song
"Madoc is a butterfly, Mommy is a caterpillar, and Daddy is a sock." Chase sang this song today. When she sang it a second time, she ended it, "Daddy is a spider." Too funny.
Friday, July 03, 2009
Chase's Room
Today we rearranged Chase's room, so that there is "more to do," in hopes she may decide to play a little when she wakes up - before coming into our room. We are also reworking Mads' room a bit as Hubs needs to add a closet (so it can be officially called a bedroom if we sell this house) and because Mads is going to be on the move VERY SOON, which means we need to childproof this house. Egads.
Thursday, July 02, 2009
Chase's First Prayer
Hubs put Chase to bed tonight - and said a prayer with her before bed. He told me later that he asked her what she was most thankful for; she said love.
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